Virginia Beach: First 36hrs

Everyone who knows me knows that I jump to conclusions, and over exaggerate just about every elementary situation. I'm a "drama queen", or as I just put it "queen", because well I'm royalty. Duh. NO, like I was sayi---typing, Virginia Beach for 2 years is not ideal for me. I'm an Army brat, I'm used to moving, and I'm used to being "the new girl." Blah Blah Blah, I learn to adapt and get over it. Honestly, I'm sick of having to settle into/ adapt to places I can't even see myself being happy in. I've only been in Virginia 36hrs, and I've come to terms with gradually accepting my spiritual defeat. I mean, I signed the contract...right?
Being that it's only been 36hrs and concluding such a thing is a bit dramatic, don't you think? Well I don't. I'm new. I have a roommate, that I'm more than positive is "not my type" of person. I'm new. This base is 73X bigger than my last one. I'm new. I'm still awkward. AND I'm new.

Honestly, I think It's just anxiety; bunch of idiots told me I was officially entering "the real Navy", and my support system (aka everyone I left in El Centro) isn't here to laugh everything off with me. I'm sure I'll meet very amazing people here in Virginia, hell, I may even meet a cutie boy with lots of money, but as of right now I'm alone. I'm alone, and it's scary. OKAY, that's not 100% true either. Just today I spent about an hour catching up with an old friend who has been stationed here since we left Florida together back in 2010. It was good seeing a familiar face, and I'm so thankful for that. I remember having conversations with my friends back in El Centro, they kept telling me this is "a new chapter, or a new journey" I think if I keep thinking of this, moving to Virginia, as a journey; It will ultimately help me get over my anxiety. I guess that's what this post is about, in a nutshell. Getting over it. That's about the only thing I can do.

Something that I haven't even mentioned yet (wanted ya'll to sympathize with my sorry ass) is that my dad is actually KINDA here with me right now. Okay, he is totally here with me right now. He drove me up here from Georgia, and doesn't leave until tomorrow. He helped me move into my new barracks, and we actually went "exploring" today. Found out that the actual Virginia Beach...BEACH is about 7 miles away from base. Also found out that Chik-fil-A is close enough to smell. AND their is a Starbucks on base. Having my dad here has been nothing short of a blessing. He's the coolest 49 year old I know, personally. That being said, I think knowing that he leaves tomorrow is what I'm really upset about. But, I've been in the Navy almost 3 years now, and I've made it this far...so it's safe to say that I'm more than positive that I'll be alright.


If not? I'll just find an elevator shaft...and jump.

"well I miss my old house and my old room. The soft, fate whistles of the trains at 3 AM, and at 5 in the morning too"

fambly away from home.

Here I am, about 36hrs left in the dessert. Not doing too much, I'm hangin' with the "woman of the year", jammin' Biz Markie; you know the usual. I wouldn't say I'm sad just yet, being completely and utterly anxious about Virginia is time consuming. I mean when I think Virginia, my first assumption is "oh, Columbus Georgia's carbon copy." But that couldn't be fair, right? Like who am I to prejudge Virginia? Which leaves me questioning myself. Like when'd I get so judg-ie-ish? Anyways, that ridiculously good looking woman to my right is Tierra Hammond. Have you ever just clicked with someone so absolute, it literally threw you backwards? I know, me neither. In all seriousness, T is one of those people who you hate complementing because her head expands, but she's also one of the smartest people I've ever met. It's inspiring actually. She also has one of the most darling babies I have ever caught glimpse of.

His names Xavier, and I'm just so in love with this kid. Practically started living with these two in *base housing, when he was born 6 months ago. These two are the closest thing to family I have here in El Centro, gunna miss these turds. So that being said, I figured I should post something on this blog, because it is a blog for crying out loud. p.s. *base housing: sorry excuse for living quarters on any/all military facilities. Later, idiots.

 Happy family spam. Whatever, you're jealous. *rolls entire eyeball.

Me, trying to be funny on Facebook...

but stopping myself because I am not.

I'm not really "feeling" today. Coincidently this is just one day after my "oh, you can do it. be all that you can be" blog post. Honestly, it's this move. Too much to handle at my maturity level. Like this is about a 7.9, and I'm clearly at a solid 4 on the maturity scale. Clearly. Went to work and blahshitted for an hour or so, and now I'm in bed about to watch 'the devil's rejects'. Don't want to be the only idiot whose never seen it.

OH! I have sinus migraine. Probably the same sinus migraine I've had for 3 years now, which, in reality could be some different medical condition, and considering I'm not invisible, could very well kill me.
THAT WAS A RUN-ON-SENTENCE.

You guys ever get pissed at Zoey Deschanel for breaking things off with Ben Gibbard, or am I the only person who invest precious time into other peoples problems? The next Death Cab album will be legendary. Goodbye for now.

With a happy heart

Two years ago, I was afraid of wanting anything. I was afraid that wanting would lead to trying, and trying would lead to failure. Two years ago, I made the decision to leave home, I wanted so much and needed to act on it. Two years ago I joined the United States Navy, and now I've come to realize that I want so much more.

I want to visit Europe regularly.
I want to get invited to the White House.
I want a condo in New York.
I want to win, and be humble.
I want to loose, and contain my composure.
I want the world for my family, and I want them to want it too.
I want so much, but ultimately I want opportunity.

Being in the Navy has taught me plenty, but most of all I think I've learned that the opportunity is out there; the only factor is how much do I want it. With a happy heart, and a serene spirit you can see through almost anything. It's almost like backing up, and looking at the whole picture. Even the blurry parts. It's not wrong to know what you want, and it's not wrong to know that you may not get it. It's only wrong when you sell yourself short, and only settle for whats expected. I guess all I'm trying to say is, I've given myself a pretty good start, and all I really want is an interesting and surprising life that I can look back on and smile. Not just for me, but for my family and friends that I love dearly. For people that I don't know that have dreams, and for the people I do that are afraid to want, to try and to fail. Everyone deserves at least the opportunity, with a happy heart..

I call this:

Have you ever just started drawing something, and hours go by and you're still in the process of drawing this...something? That's just the thing though, what is this? Haha, I've come up with a few titles and these are they:
- Diamond in Methland
- The Chronicles of Diamond, the gremlin, the song birds, and the circle head kid. (my personal fav)
-Go to sleep, Diamond

really tough, so I think I may just sleep on it.

Clearly... CLEARLY

I mean how "into" yourself do you have to be if you have someone taking pictures of you...taking a picture of yourself...Diamond? THEN, posting the picture they took verses the picture you took, because  it looks more "bloggy"? I just made that word up. Clearly I have nothing better to do today. I put my iTunes on shuffle, and every 9 songs or so The Beach Boys come on, and I've come to realize that I really just HATE The Beach Boys. Like why'd I download those idiots anyways? Really into The Temper Trap and Cold War Kids lately. I like the whole soulful dude voice over fancy guitar riffs and drams...drums, whatever. Checking twitter, and some idiot on my timeline just posted 4 different sad faces in 4 different tweets. Like we get it, you're having a bad day. This blog is just a quick jot of current thoughts. Like how I really miss "this dude", not gonna get into that. Like how I have absolutely nothing to eat in my room, and how the commissary is closed because it's Sunday. Like how I really wish I had a bunny rabbit, and how like I've been hinting to everyone I know that a bunny would change my life. Like how I'm moving to Virginia in like 13 days, and how like WHO just moves to Virginia? Right..right? On everything I love, The Beach Boys just came on again. Like how I over use the word like.

Anyways, I had a dream in which I took nearly 6 shots of espresso because it tasted like chocolate syrup. Of course. Naturally, this dream occurred during my drunken slumber. Oh 21, how thee changed my world. Clearly.

Rollllllling Stonesssssss

on rollingstone.com there is a list of The 100 Greatest Singers

I was curious to whom held the number one spot, and a couple of people were in my mind. Like me? haha right. Anyways, the spot, in the end, was given to Aretha Franklin. Aretha Franklin, though I never really took the time to ever just sit down and actually LISTEN to Aretha Franklin, I was completely aware of who she was (considering I'm not a complete idiot) Anyways, there is a little description they have to the right of her photo. It had the date she was born, her most popular songs, and other artist in which she has influenced. Then under are a couple of paragraphs about her, and her voice, and how it has moved so many people. It's like this for the other 99 artist who made the list too. So I started to skim through her dedication when I read "Even the way she pronounces words is amazing: In "Giving Him Something He Can Feel," when she sings, "Many say that I'm too young" — the way she says "I'm," you can almost see her saying it, like she's all in your face, but you're still right with her.", and it made want to listen to the song. I then realized that there is so much music out there that I don't even know. So much music that I want to know, I just don't even know it. Anyways, this is what I'm going to do. I am going to single handily go through all 100 of the artist on this list, and read up on them while listening to one of there most popular songs. BUT not one that I've already heard, take Ray Charles whom made number 2 on the list; I choose to listen to "You Don't know me" vs "Georgia on my Mind", get it? Idiot. Anyways, I'm on number 2 and I have a long ways to go. I'm pretty excited.

*hrs later*

I think my favorite is Buddy Holly who came up 48 on the list. I liked him most because he was just some dorky looking white kid from Texas, who died way too early. I look of him (and The Crickets) and it reminds me a lot of kids today. Just a group a guys…in a band. Except Buddy just so happened to be in the band that influenced the band that influence the band you're in. Or even your favorite band. I also think Buddy Holly would have been my best friend, but thats for another blog in which will be titled "People I wish were alive, so I could attempt a life long friendship with". Buddy would make 3rd after Tate from "American Horror Story" and Professor Snape. 

There were a couple of people who ever placed, in my opinion, incorrectly. Like Lennon before McCartney? Elvis 3rd? NO. I mean, Elvis makes the list; yes, but Elvis is not 3rd. The fact that Stevie Nicks didn't even make the list is beyond me, and neither did Lauryn Hill. Like WHATTTTT THE SHIT, right? Besides all that ridiculousness I can say that I truthfully learned a bunch about music, I mean because I thought I knew everything already.